A shiny smartphone, left on a nearby table, starts buzzing with a charming little ringtone — the kind you’d expect from someone who still personalizes their incoming calls. He picks it up. Maybe he thinks it’s his. Maybe he’s trying to be helpful. Or maybe he’s just curious. Either way, he answers.
“Hello?”
A woman’s voice comes through, warm and familiar — the kind of voice that belonging to a wife who knows exactly how to get what she wants.
“Honey, it’s me. Are you at the club?”
He should’ve said, “You’ve got the wrong number.” He doesn’t.
“Yes,” he answers, calm as ever.
“Perfect! Listen, I’m at the mall. I just found a gorgeous mink coat — stunning. Can I buy it?”
He pauses for a moment, but only long enough to play the part a little better.
“What’s the price?”
“Only fifteen hundred.”
“Well,” he says, “if you like it that much, go ahead.”
Anyone else would’ve ended it there. But this woman has momentum.
“And while I was out,” she continues, “I stopped by the Mercedes dealership. Those new models just came out. I saw one I absolutely love. The salesman gave me a price — sixty thousand. And since we need to trade in the BMW…”
“For that price,” he says, “make sure it has all the options.”
A few heads around the lounge turn. People pretend not to listen, but of course they’re listening. This is far better than the golf stories they were stuck with five minutes ago.
The woman on the phone is thrilled — too thrilled. And she isn’t done.
“One last thing,” she adds. “I drove by that house we loved last year — the one with the pool, the English garden, a whole acre of private parkland. And it’s beachfront. It’s back on the market.”
“How much?” he asks, now fully committed to the bit.
“Four hundred fifty thousand. But honestly, it’s a steal. And we have enough in the bank to cover it.”
He takes a breath as the entire lounge leans into the conversation.
“Offer four-twenty,” he says. “See if they’ll take it.”
The woman gushes. “You’re the best. I love you.”
“Love you too,” he replies, almost tenderly.
